A question people keep on asking is how I manage to keep a balance between family, work, and free time. It is not an easy feat, in fact, it often feels like a balancing act, threatened by anything that might be unplanned. It was the case of some time, but after a couple of months, some fine-tuning, and a lot of help from my wife I can say that it is manageable. The key element is planning and communication. My weekday is divided into three parts:
- Family
- Photography
- Firefighting & EMS
- Free Time
The part that is not flexible is family time. The kids have to get up, get some breakfast go, and get back from school, so that’s the core of our planning.
Here is an example of a typical day:
06:00 Alarm goes off –> morning routine
06:15 Walk the dog
06:30 Prepare and have Breakfast
06:55 Get Ellie ready to leave with mom
07:00 Get the car ready for the boys
07:15 Get the boys to school
08:00 Alone, …. the workday can begin
12:00 Try to get a lunch break.
12:30 Get back to work
15:00 Pick up the kids from school
16:00 Have a healthy snack
16:00 House Chores
17:00 Family time
18:00 Dinner time
19:00 Get the kids ready for bed, Rescue Service shift starts
20:00 Check that everybody is done and in bed.
20:15 Free time. The relaxing part of the day ….
22:00 Bed Time
Of course, as of 19:00, all bets are open. If I get called out, Tania is on her own with the kids. It is important to note that the partners of us volunteer first responders need to be 100% on board with us doing what we do. Leaving at a moment’s notice can cause some stress.
I won’t try to hide the fact that those days are tiring all by themselves, not even taking the nightly callouts into account. The key to keeping getting enough energy is to remain flexible during the parts of the day that allow it. I will sometimes take a couple of hours out of my work schedule to get some quality time or rest in. There are days where I will not take on any shift so that I can go to bed knowing I won’t be woken up for an emergency.
The secret
The most important aspect of family life is undoubtedly communication. Not only for the schedule but in general. We take some time before going to bed to talk about the day or issues that might lead to stress.
Our main rule since we have been together: We don’t go to bed angry.
We chose Sundays after breakfast to be an ideal time to sit down together and make the planning for the coming week. That allows us to keep surprises during the week at bay and thus reduce the stress in the morning.